The 5 Stages of Grief in Divorce – How a Colorado Divorce Attorney Can Guide You Through the Process
By Matthew C. Clawson – Colorado Divorce Attorney
Divorce is not just a legal process — it’s an emotional and psychological transition that can impact every area of your life. Even if you are confident that ending your marriage is the right decision, it’s normal to experience feelings of loss, sadness, and uncertainty.
Psychologists often compare divorce to a “social death” because it ends a primary relationship and disrupts your identity, routines, and vision for the future. These emotions often follow the Five Stages of Grief described by Dr. Elisabeth Kübler-Ross in On Death and Dying.
While you may not experience each stage in order, understanding them can help you recognize your feelings and make better decisions — especially when paired with guidance from an experienced Colorado divorce attorney who understands both the legal and emotional realities of the process.
Stage 1: Denial – “This can’t be happening.”
In the denial stage, you may resist the reality of divorce. You might avoid opening legal papers, delay finding an attorney, or focus on the hope of reconciliation.
Legal Risk in Denial:
Failing to respond to a divorce petition in Colorado within the statutory deadlines (C.R.S. § 14-10-107) can result in default orders — meaning the court could enter decisions about property, custody, and support without your input.
Attorney Support:
- Explains the legal process step-by-step so you know exactly what to expect.
- Ensures deadlines are met to protect your rights.
- Helps you start gathering financial documents early to avoid rushed or incomplete disclosures.
Stage 2: Anger – “This isn’t fair.”
Anger can be intense during divorce — toward your spouse, their attorney, or even the legal system. In Colorado, acting out of anger can lead to costly mistakes, such as refusing reasonable settlement offers or sending inflammatory communications that harm your case.
Attorney Support:
- Acts as your professional advocate, removing you from direct conflict.
- Channels your concerns into constructive legal strategy.
- Keeps negotiations fact-based and focused on your long-term interests rather than short-term emotional wins.
Stage 3: Bargaining – “Maybe we can work this out if…”
Bargaining often involves making promises or offering compromises to avoid the pain of divorce. While compromise is part of most Colorado divorce settlements, bargaining from a place of fear can mean giving up too much.
Legal Risk in Bargaining:
- Agreeing to unequal property division (C.R.S. § 14-10-113) without understanding the full value of marital assets.
- Accepting unsustainable spousal maintenance or child support terms.
Attorney Support:
- Reviews all settlement proposals to ensure they align with Colorado’s equitable distribution standards.
- Uses valuation experts for businesses, real estate, and retirement accounts so you know the true worth of marital property.
- Negotiates creative solutions that meet your goals while remaining fair and enforceable.
Stage 4: Depression – “I don’t know if I can do this.”
This stage often sets in as the reality of life changes sinks in — new financial realities, possible changes in parenting time, and a shift in personal identity.
Attorney Support:
- Takes over the procedural and strategic workload so you can focus on your emotional health.
- Connects you with trusted mental health professionals and financial planners.
- Provides a clear legal roadmap so you feel less overwhelmed by uncertainty.
Stage 5: Acceptance – “I’m ready to move forward.”
Acceptance means you are ready to adapt to your new reality and begin building a future beyond the divorce.
Attorney Support:
- Finalizes all required Colorado court orders and ensures compliance with C.R.C.P. Rule 16.2 (full financial disclosure).
- Ensures QDROs, property transfers, and title changes are executed correctly.
- Helps you anticipate and prevent post-decree disputes, such as parenting time modifications or enforcement actions.
Why Legal Guidance Matters in Every Stage of Divorce
The emotional stages of divorce are universal, but the legal consequences of each stage are unique to Colorado law. Without an attorney:
- You risk missing critical deadlines.
- You may undervalue marital assets.
- You could agree to financial or parenting terms that are difficult or impossible to change later.
An experienced Colorado divorce attorney ensures that your decisions are not driven solely by emotion but are grounded in legal strategy designed to protect your financial security, parental rights, and long-term well-being
Special Considerations for High-Asset Divorce and Professionals
If you are a doctor, business owner, tech executive, or other high-net-worth professional, the stakes are even higher. These cases often involve:
- Business valuation and goodwill assessments
- Division of complex investment portfolios
- Stock options, RSUs, and deferred compensation
- Professional practice protection and partnership agreements
A skilled attorney will coordinate with forensic accountants, valuation experts, and tax professionals to ensure your property division is fair and supported by credible evidence.
Matthew C. Clawson – Helping Clients Through Both the Legal and Emotional Journey of Divorce
At Clawson & Clawson, LLP, we understand that divorce is both a legal battle and an emotional journey. Our role is to guide you through both — protecting your rights, minimizing unnecessary conflict, and helping you move toward a future you can feel confident about. Call us at (719) 602-5888 or contact us online.
Michael M. Clawson | Colorado Divorce Attorney
Email: Michael@clawsonattorney.com